Excerpts from an excellent Air New Zealand flight.

"As smoking on an airplane is extremely hazardous, smoking is not permitted on this flight at any time - if you are found smoking you will be asked to step outside."

"For those of you who haven't noticed, we've landed at Auckland International Airport. For your safety, please remain seated with your seatbelt securely fastened until the seatbelt sign is switched off. In the event of the aircraft suddenly stopping during taxi, we wouldn't want you to reach the terminal before the aircraft."

"If you think the captain is making these announcements you are completely wrong, the captain is far too busy."

The steward guy also let some random little kids hand out the candy which was really cute. Etc.

I am tired.