A lot happens, in the space of a year.

Why do I always gloss over important subjects and points? I did it yesterday. I just did it again. Work? Is that as important?

I feel really bad now, because I'd forgotten what this date held, 365 days prior; back when I actually thought getting to my class on time was more important than some random text message sent from my father.

Even now I still feel really bad that on that day, I was more focused on getting to class than the wellbeing of family.

I'd been getting txt messages through the class. I don't even remember what the lecture was on. It was in Engineering somewhere, and the content musn't have been important because I don't remember it.

I was sitting with Matt. But what are you supposed to say? I ended up reading my messages in silence. The lecture. It goes on. It's important! It's study! Study study study study till you fucking go blind in the pursuit of what, predicate logic? I know which I would rather have right now.

It takes less than a day for a lifetime to be taken away, but big boys don't cry. We have to soldier on and crap and other dumb cliches.

I'm already forgetting things. The harder you grasp the faster it slips. Memory is an elusive thing. What was her favourite food? colour? I don't remember.

Here I go again, prioritising classes. 10:20 am. I have to leave the door at 11:00. Need to shower.

Maybe it's what she would have wanted.

Henry: "I would like to build a memorial to my mother in the garden"
Random Aunt: "No, your mum wants you to study don't waste your time on these things"

She's probably made about 2000 friends by now, wherever she is. Heaven, other life, whatever. Comforting thoughts? Not really. I'll probably never see her again.

I love her still, and that's the hardest part.

Study. Fuck study. I want my mum back :(