Points:

1) iPod

It's so wickedly cool. I've spent so much time playing with it...one of the greatest toys I've had the priviledge of owning. I wish I had a Firewire cable though cause slow transfers are kind of a pain in the ass. But it's all worth it (slow internet has conditioned a patient streak in me anyway).

2) Chamber Orchestra

We got Silver. Huge congratulations, I'm very surprised that we did, to be honest. I wasn't expecting it. Good work guys!

3) Talent Quest

I think I'm set for both Singing and Band categories. Thankfully I finally found the costume for Singing. Wahoo. Thanks, you know who you are. :)

===

Read parts of William's Psychology textbook. Kinda interesting. My favourite is what it mentions on the affect of groups on people.

The more people you put together the stupider everybody gets. Try it. It's mob mentality. And it applies in real life! I'll give you an example.

Form Time: Kinda stupid.
House Assembly: Stupid.
School Assembly: Extremely stupid.

See, it works. An argument, thus, to be a loner and not go to parties and do stupid things. But then again maybe stupid isn't such a bad thing.

Today's expenditures.

1. Crappy plastic cowboy hat that's really quite small and probably won't fit on my head properly - $2
2. A book from Whitcoulls, Michael Chricton's "Prey" - $2
3. A 40GB ipod kit and car kit - $999.97

Mwahha. There goes half my bank account. I was extremely bored and I thought hey, let's go buy something I really want.

So I bought it.

I have a headache. I still can't find the clothing I was supposed to find today though.

Interesting things:

While in a teahouse on Queen Street yesterday during the KBB Music Festival where Thomas lost his "Pearl Milk Tea" virginity, William (not my brother, the other one) came across a comic book. Those Japanese, they're so crazy. The comic is about prisoner naked swordfighting lesbian sisters, fighting humaniod machines.

Also, according to my mums for a while now ants have been nesting in our stereo (the really really old one that still works pretty okay I suppose) - and she cleaned it out today. Supposedly there were all these eggs and crap too. Damn ants.

Chosen a song for the Talent Quest final now.

I need to go to Botany to find some stuff.

My birthday this year lies on a Sunday. I could have a party, but my house is kinda small. I dunno...hrm.

Interpretations of my dream so far:

Rikky: The dream means that you should drink more juice. Coz that way your
defying society- society in your dream being the man with glasses, and juice
being the thing you like doing. Oh yeah.
david: wow, [henry], i
thought ppl neva died in their dreams. my advice is dont go drinking juice in
rutherford.
henry: yeah, i was quite thirsty.
An Chia: and you were
thirsty
An Chia: oh and i think the red chair symbolises blood
An Chia:
maybe henry was scared of being raped lol kidding...nah...maybe ur scared of
death

Yeah. Interesting keep them coming! I'm also now on the delivering end of an event quite like the one between Ming and me last year over English CIE results. (Ming got an A while I only got a C, and we studied together with the exact same notes...) ...I feel Sonny 's pain. Yes, yes. But you all leave him alone for now y'hear. Don't go hassling him, give him space.

Yes.

Anyway I'm tired. Good night to all.

Hello there. I am not in a particularly good mood, and I can't really pin-point a reason. I suppose that's how life is, I suppose.

1. I discovered something today that FUCKS ME OFF to no avail (in a bad way). People who eat with their mouth open and can't seem to eat with their mouth closed. People have noses for a reason, if you're forced to use your mouth for something other than breathing at least have the courtesy to not fill the room with squelches. I'm not one who enjoys the sounds of masticating. So please, if you ever eat around me, don't chew like some kind of crazed crusher machine. It's actually not the mouth open I mind so much but the annoying chewychewy noises. Fuck.

2. The word FUCK pisses me off. It just makes me so angry. I don't know why.

3. Band practice was scheduled for today. I shoulda known it wouldn't have worked because John did a no-show, me and Dave got kicked out before Tomo could arrive and Dave had to do some Media studies and Economics stuff anyway. So basically I wasted an hour and a half after school.

4. I got my exam results back. I'm angry at myself. I got a "NO RESULT" for Chemistry. I'm not sure if I'm angry at the result, or angry that I don't really care about the result. Well, I do, but indirectly. It's only what my mum will say. Whatever, it's too late now. My Physics mark was alright though, I got a B. Woozah. From D to B, and without a teacher in between.

5. I'm angry. I don't know why.

6. FUCK.

I will probably look back on this post and think how immature and childish it is, but hey, gimme a break. I'm only sixteen.

(My mummy did buy me a cake for my birthday though, thanks mum. Maybe I'll actually have a party this year, if it doesn't clash with exams. I would check but my bag is just so far away from here, I can't be arsed going to fish out the timetable.)

I learnt something interesting in physics today. You see, I'd noticed that for all my life (that I can remember, anyway), I saw clearly defined blue and red edges to most things. (For example, right now the left edge of my monitor is blue, while the right edge has a red tinge). Well, the answer to this is because of my glasses. Yes, that's right. You see, the different wavelengths of visible light refract/diffract different amounts through my glasses. As a result, chromatic aberration occurs and that's what those silly edges I see are.

Now I know two things:

1. Why that happens.
2. They're not supposed to happen.

All the more reason for awesome LAZER EYE SUGERY later on in life.

In other news, my mum is doing kung fu and it looks really silly. Tee hee.

Last night I had a really strange and scary dream.

I was drinking a cup of juice (blackcurrant and apple if you had to know), and I was happily drinking cup after cup, until this really scary guy wearing sunglasses walked into the room I was in (I was sitting on a red chair) and told me if I drank another cup of juice, he'd kill me.

That scared me for a while. But then I drank another cup.

And then when I'd finished the cup and relished how nice it was, I looked up and there was this guy. With a gun pointed at me. I turned, jumped to dodge but it was too late, I was hit in the side and I lay on the floor bleeding and dying.

It sucked.

But I remember I died happy because I tasted the juice.

==end==

What does the dream mean?! Someone, tell me!

Storytime!

Yesterday was Closing night of the production. It's sad. That's the last school production I'll be involved in. (Then again I could do that for the rest of my life, OH NO ITS SAD THERE GO MY SKIN CELLS but for the sake of sanity I probably won't) I got Toblerone (one of the best chocolates, mmmm) courtesy of Miss Hall. Thanks!

And then afterwards was the production cast party. Even though they'd ordered pizza for everyone, because the orchestra was busy packing away the equipment by the time we got to even consider taking a bite of food, all the pizza was gone. Bastards. But it didn't matter because Tomo then gave me (and other people) a lift to Rebecca's After Cast Party. It was great fun, yes. Jack Hargreaves is hilarious when he's off his face. Before the party I got egged though...by some random bitch from a car that was driving past while I was standing at a street corner waiting to get into the house...

Yeah, it was great fun. Indeed.

---

The damn Mormons are back again.

My mobile phone needs defragging. O_O

Okay, story for today.

==STORY TIME!~-==

I was sitting at home, on my computer right, chatting away as usual, when I heard an unfamiliar knock on the door. (It's funny how you can kinda make a random guess whether you know the person at the door or not just by the force of the knock, the pitch and volume of the knock itself, etc.)

I opened the door, not particularly happy since it's a Saturday morning and I hadn't taken a shower or anything and I probably looked semi-stoned. Turns out that it was two Jehovah Witnesses at the doorstep - one was a silly looking Asian lady who didn't do much through the whole encounter other than nod her head, while the other one was the one who did the talking and attempted conversion. Owen and Abigail I do believe (random sidenote: Abigail? What sort of name is that? That's like calling a guy Thom. What do you want him to be, beaten up at school?)

Anyway apparently they'd come on the premise that William was home and they wanted to talk to him but...William and my mum had gone to Botany for some retail therapy, which left me all home alone and completely unprepared and slightly annoyed at this random intrusion. Since William wasn't home they told me that they'd come back tomorrow morning (which if I'm lucky I won't be around) and they gave me some random magazines to give to him. I thought that was the end of my troubles, that I could safely now end the conversation and go back to being a loner at home. It seems that I didn't have a bad enough look on my face (maybe if I was half naked they would have left earlier), because they didn't just go away. They deviously manipulated their way into changing the subject from "is William home" to "how are you I'm going to talk to you about some Jehovah stuff"...first it started off with "are you William's brother", then they got my name...and then they got my school subjects...and then he started talking about Physics and suddenly WHAM there it is, the opening for the religious conversion attempt.

The guy whipped out some bible (I must say though, I did nothing to dissuade him) and talked about some stuff about black holes and some stars and some passage in the bible that says something along the lines of "there are many stars and God knows where they all are and energy and stuff". Now, here was the crucial point. I could have gone "MY WORD THATS SO TRUE I COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY BELIEVE YOU NOW"...but unfortunately I'm just not built that way.

His leaving question was, "Where did the energy [to make the stars] come from?" Obviously he implied that Jehovah God must have made it and based that on the fact that it was written in The Bible. And here is the crucial point that stops me in even contemplating in believing in any religion that has a Holy Book/Record/Transcript. He was reading from a Bible. But...everybody says it's at least 2000 years old. Let me make a very simple analogy for you.

Ever heard of the game "Chinese Whispers"? Yes. Well, imagine having to remember not just one sentence, but a lot of books. Now, instead of going around in a circle once, go around the circle for 2000 years. And involve a lot of people.

How accurate is the final thing going to be? How much of it is truth, how much of it is fake? Who knows?

I'm sorry if I'm indirectly offending anyone, these are just my views. Feel free to counter them. Start an argument, I like arguments. They're very engaging. That's why I don't like the bible. I don't like people reading from the bible because to me it's like reading a pack of unknown lies.

I must say though, that big black Jehovah witness guy called Owen (not the random Asian lady) was really quite clever and perceptive. He'd make a good salesman. A very cunning linguist.

And there ends my interesting story for the day.

Cookies are way too tasty for their own good. If they weren't so crisp yet fluffy yet slurry and magic to the tastebuds I bet you the population of cookies would be a lot higher than it is today. Yes, I am eating cookies right now. Fruit and Nut ones, if you were wondering. I am 4/10 of the way through out of my 10 pack.

Mmm, cookies.

If the world was 1000 people:

Gender: 520 women, 480 men
Location: 584 Asians, 124 Africans, 84 Latin Americans, 95 Europeans, 55 Russians, 52 North Americans, 4 Australians, 2 New Zealanders
Language: 165 speak Mandarin Chinese, 86 English, 83 Hindi, 64 Spanish, 58 Russian, 37 Arabic
Religion: 329 Christians, 178 Moslems, 167 non-religious, 132 Hindus, 62 Buddhists, 45 atheists, 3 Jews, 86 other
Age: 330 are children, 60 are over 65
Births: 28 new babies are born each year
Mortality: 10 people die each year (3 from lack of food, 1 from cancer, 2 are babies)
Money: 200 persons control 75% of the wealth, 200 others receive only 2% of the wealth
Education: 335 adults are illiterate, 9 have graduated from college, 200 can not read at all
Miscellaneous: 5 are soldiers, 7 are teachers, 1 is a doctor, 3 are war refugees, half of the women have access to contraceptives, 70 own cars, 100 are gay

Today was an interesting day. Mufti day, wore the Totally Cool and Awesome Band T-Shirt (tm), didn't do much for the whole day, really...what I did do:

1. First period, Art Photography. Did some prints, kinda panicking because four boards are due to be completed...by the end of the term. That's not a lot of time, at all...

2. Second period, Music. Did some crazy harmonic analysis. I'm still quite slow and horrible at it, and I'm still attributing my crapness at music theory in general to me not doing music since 4th Form.

Miss Hall had a megaphone. She seemed to enjoy having it way too much. I must remember to buy one for her for the end of the year. Don't tell her. Or maybe you should, maybe she won't believe you.

The rest of my school day (until 2:00) I spent learning how to use the school's extremely expensive mixer board thingmie (which is, exceedingly cool) and trying to get FFOF to get some recording done but then being let down in a major, major way by J-Bo, you letter down you. Oh well.

Then after school there was the first day at work. I'm slightly worried that I haven't signed any contracts or filled in any timesheets or anything, so...meh. Hopefully they'll remember that I'm actually working there and remember to pay me. Watching little kids sing is really funny. If you're reading this Sonny, ask Claudia to sing for you some time.

Then, there was production which I was rushed to straight from work (I was still late though, indirectly due to the rain)...and it was okay this night. Less screwups. The lion dance is still in my opinion the weakest link in the entire show although Katherine take heart you do a great job, I'm complaining about the lion itself and how it doesn't really do anything and just...I don't know. It doesn't impress me. Maybe it's because I'm not white and I don't squeal in delight just because it's a sheer novelty Asian thing.

Yes.

I'm tired.

Very much so.

And if anyone knows the name of that song that plays in the Caltex ad, the one with the little kid in the Elvis suit who goes "one day, I might want to marry you, so right now I'm going to be real nice, to your mum", PLEASE TELL ME.

Thanks.

I was gonna write a big long post about how if someone doesn't speak your language, speaking it loudly and slower seems to help them.

But then I didn't.

The most depressing thing about today is that I spent about half of it in a dark auditorium doing nothing for about 3/4 of the time. Yes, it was the technical rehearsal of the school production where we all witnessed just how hard it is for the lighting crew to get anything right. (Okay, maybe that's a bit harsh, they do a good job in the circumstances (ie Mrs. Jennings) but still, I have to take it out on someone...) I had a splitting headache all the way through the rehearsal because:

1. I woke up (again) to the sound of domestic arguments (again), which doesn't do wonders for anybody.
2. I strained to read the music on my page. It's hard enough that I'm reading off the conductor's score, with a page turn every ten bars or so, but to try to read it in dim light (which really shouldn't have been the case, if the lighting crew had done its job and set up the lights for the orchestra) is just that little bit harder.

Anyway, it ended up as a really annoying rehearsal. Most of the time was just sitting there, when the weather outside was pretty good and it was a Saturday, for goodness sake. People in the orchestra who didn't watch the conductor (ie Serena, the "drummer") made it even more annoying.

Annyoing.

Anoiying.

...yeah, anyway, that was the bad part of today.

The GOOD part was after production when me and the rest of FFOF and a couple of other people (who I will talk about later) went to Thomas' house for a little get-together party thing for his sister's (Stephanie) Japanese Exchange Student, whose name escapes me even though I heard it about ten minutes ago, but I know it involves an A. Something like...Ayaka? I'm not too sure.

Anyway, Thomas' family organised it just so that Ayaka could have a good time or something to that effect and I had a good time too. FFOF was back together at last (I'm not sure how David was coping with the evils of infections but, he seemed okay), and I met:

==1. Ayaka==

Who was a typical Japanese female teenager. For some strange reason though, she knew how to play the drums as well (apparently she had played in elementary school while in Japan), so she played a few songs with the rest of the band and I sang (I think. Or maybe I sat there). She also had the Japanese version of Somewhere over the Rainbow lying around, and could play the saxophone, which

==2. Jonathan (I'm not sure how to spell this but that's my best shot)==

Could also do (and probably a lot better, although both didn't really play enough for any sort of decent comparison). He's the Fourth Form saxophone player whom Miss Hall kept bugging Thomas to photocopy music for as he (John) wanted to play in the school Concert Band and Stage Band. He was really good. He also didn't really look Fourth Form, but then again this is coming from the person who forgot that Steph too was Fourth Form (I'm sorry! Don't hit me...) I taught him how to play the drum part (or part of it, anyway) to N.E.R.D. - She Wants To Move.

==3. The Band==

Played pretty much all of the songs we knew: All the Small Things, Say it Aint So, tried to do Movies but kinda failed, same deal with The Vines - Get Free and Basket Case by Green Day, but we did pull off Somewhere over the Rainbow and our original again and kind of half-did Sweet Child of Mine. Also, there were random jams with Ayaka (?) which was Smoke on the Water, I do believe, and Saxamaphonist Jonathan, me, Dave, Willie and Tomo had a random jazz jam. It was good.

==4. Food==

Consisted of awesome home-made pizzas (thanks, Mrs. Wood) and dessert was chocolate fondue. I'd never had it before and it was kinda fun trying to not lose my bite-sized piece of fruit in the deep well of molten chocolate. Such a novel idea, really. It's kinda like a do-it-yourself dessert. Don't like chocolate covered peach? Try a chocolate-covered banana. It was very cool.

--

Yeah, it was fun. Things I'll probably remember are:

1. How cool my new drumsticks are. They're a bit heavier but they're still quite easy to control and they give a lot more volume and offer more grip. I hadn't tried them out on actual drums until today (which was fair enough since I only bought them yesterday) so I was really surprised at the excellent result. I'm sure all the positives outweigh the hideous choice of purple for the coating.

2. Saxamaphone John playing the drum part to N.E.R.D. really really loudly.

3. Singing "Get Free", and then understanding why John Boden does not like that song.

I had a great time. I will bug Thomas for photos, I kind of want to remember that the party actually happened.

Today was a very tiring and eventful and rewarding day. I'll try to tackle it categorically but obviously the ideas will bleed into one another and the whole post will get contaminated.

But you'll forgive me.

==THE BAND==

It was pretty good. Warwick covered for David who had an ear infection and we did pretty well, I thought. The crowd seemed to like us. Of course, I disappointly dropped my sticks (AGAIN, the last time which it happened was during the "Rockfest" that the school held as practice for the Rockquest, a long long time ago in a galaxy far far away)...so I went and bought another pair to keep on top of the bass drum in the likely eventuality that I ever drop them during a performance again.

Cons: Half of the stick is purple. They are slightly heavier and therefore will probably end up tiring me faster. Or something. $17.95

Pros: The purple half is some crazy rubberish coating which improves my grip, so therefore the odds that I'll drop the sticks are slightly lower. They're longer...and they're thicker. I assume that means they'll be louder, too. They were actually $19.95 but I got a discount because of the Rockquest HURRAY

Maybe instead of keeping them on top of the bass drum I'll keep them in a backpack that I'll wear and if I drop sticks, I'll act all ninja like and whip out a new pair from my bag. How cool would that be....(not much, but better than looking like a tard while the drumming stops for a decent amount of time and you grab your sticks off the floor)

Actually, talking to people after the performance I was surprised at the number of people who didn't notice I dropped my sticks (I also pulled the fingers at the drums out of habit which really wasn't a smart idea with the principal watching but that's...another matter) Maybe they were too caught up in the music. Maybe I played the drums with my mind while I was picking my sticks up. Maybe those people were deaf.

Yeah, but it was fun. I had fun, playing. Yeah...I felt like a huge tard afterwards though, because I'd dropped my sticks. But when I talked to people and found that at least one person didn't notice it didn't feel so silly any more.

(sidenote: The electronic drum kit I'm trying to save up for isn't $2000 like I thought, but $2999...at least I have a job now, as low paying as it is. Maybe me and Tomo should go busking)

==LICENSE==

Today I went to reclaim my learner's license. If you remember, I had lost my entire wallet at KLIA a long time ago and ever since then I'd been slowly replacing everything I had in it. Yeah, I'd lost my learners there which meant I had a very good excuse for not learning to drive yet.

I lost that reason today. I went and paid the $31.50 it cost for a replacement, saw Gareth there booking his full license test and felt a twinge of...guilt? Whatever, it was just that he was in Sixth Form...and booking his full...and there I was getting back my learners. o_O

Then my mum drove me to the Temple Carpark and told me to drive around. It was quite embarassing because:

1. It was totally illegal - we didn't put up L plates yet.
2. All of my mums friends were there and looking at me strangely.
3. I drive incredibly shittily.

More on point number three: I can drive a mean bumper car, but a full sized proper fuck-off car is a bit much for me to handle. The main problem is just that I can't see anything...I have no idea where the left side of the car ends, and where the back ends, and reversing is incredibly hard and I always seem to cut too much into the right side of the road (simply because I don't know where the left side is)...the pedals were way too sensitive for my tastes (especially the brake, I never knew a car could brake so hard.)

Anyway, I've made up my mind. I hate driving. I mean, sure, it's great and convenient and it's great that you can drive around and be cool and pick up friends and stuff...but I guess I'm a bit selfish.

I'd rather ride a motorbike for the following reasons:

1. I can actually see where I am with no problem.
2. It's probably a fuckload easier to control.
3. I can only take one passenger at a time (no, I'm never getting a sidecar) - that means no group of stragglers trying to get a ride off me.

I mean, it's kind of stink for me to say all of this and keep accepting rides from Thomas which I'm really quite grateful for...I've always liked motorbikes. Sure, they're a lot more dangerous but it's probably a lot more fun too. It'd probably be a lot easier to get from place to place as well if I was in a big hurry as they're easier to weave in and out of traffic. So yes. I'd like to learn to ride a motorbike. My mum, however, won't let me. I guess it will have to wait until I move out or something.

==OTHER==

I gave those whiteboard pens that Mr. Barrett gives out on occassion to my Physics Tutor. It makes sense, really. Mr. Barrett is the Head of Maths at Macleans, he can pretty much do whatever the hell he wants with stationery. His handwriting is shocking and partly because of how he holds his pens - at an angle, so that all the whiteboard fluidwriting stuff flows to the back of the pen and he thinks it's out of ink. He then gives them out, but they're perfectly fine.

Of course, on the other hand, my Physics tutor's whiteboard pens are refilled and it's semi-depressing, that they're kinda dull and make it hard to read. So by giving him the whiteboard pens I got from Mr. Barrett:

1. The pens don't end up in the "refilling bin" in the Staff Room which I hear is overflowing and nobody ever refills those pens.
2. The pens don't end up in the rubbish bin when they're still perfectly useable.
3. Mr. Barrett feels good. (I may be making this one up.)
4. My Physics tutor saves money.
5. I get better quality tutoring as I can read what has been written the whiteboard much easier.

It all makes sense!

Also, while I was getting my new pair of sticks, me and my mum went to New World (the place where I lost my "watch people pack your groceries like ACTUAL grocery packers that do nothing but pack your grocery, just like in America, land of the stupid ideas, virginity") and we bought a lot of juice. By a lot, I mean in excess of 40 litres of the stuff. That meant putting all this stuff in a trolley and rolling it through most of Botany Town Centre to where our car was parked.

I felt like an idiot for a while, but I soon got over it. I then noticed that the Town Centre was a strange place indeed. Where else can you get idiotic preteens, poser-like skanks and losers who have pants ten sizes too big and geriatric couples shopping together in (relative) harmony? It's crazy.

Anyway, that's that. I can't wait for tomorrow night because Tomo's having a party. Kind of. Actually, no, not really. Here's hoping.

Song: Say it ain't so by Weezer

Here are some random quotes.

We are what we pretend to be,
so we must be careful what we pretend to be.  -Kurt Vonnegut
 
:
 
The first few steps: the first few words: the first moment when a line crosses a line and suddenly you can never stop seeing. This changes - seeing more, seeing less, seeing better, seeing worse; but seeing is the first stone in the pond, and as the ripples pread they alter everything they touch, fundamentally. Everything takes on meaning - a look, a touch, a motion, a sign, all seeds growing, seeds that never stop growing because you just never can stop them.

How can it be explained? Think of the one thing that you've always wanted - then think of it existing within you, as a part of every day, like breathing. Then think of the breathing as a living thing that begins to change, obeying only those elemental forces which we sense but can never see - and then it disappears. And then what? Once you get it, what then? You just go on and on until you become what you always were - something simple and human. Remember - it's not what you do, but the way that you do it.

So why all the worry? Why the need to possess, the need to claim, the need to feel like the one and only, the need to be "I", the need to decide one thing against another, the need to sit on the top of the heap, the need to prove? The fact of our individuality resides in us like the facts of our biology, and yet the hardest thing is to move on, to put this to one side and to be there for others, understanding and, finally, communicating. This is what makes us human, but we still want to be islands.

This would be the next step: to refuse to give in to those impulses of acceptance that trigger the mind and send us running after the rabbit around the track - to listen to the heart when we know, but we can't explain. That this set of circumstances is wrong, that we could be doing this better, that we could be moving forward instead of standing still. It's all a question of approach.

But how can an approach really be described? Can it be described? The accumulation of experience lasts a lifetime, and encompasses both thinking and doing (and all the things in-between). These things do not exist in isolation.

Closed strucutres: do we always need to force square pegs into round holes? So you go to school, and you always know what you want to do, and you know it can be done - and then you're told it can't. Not even maybe, or yes if you work towards, but not, unequivocally, no. It can't be done. How would you know until you tried? There are some shapes that can grow into others, some shapes that can change the shape of their container and some that grow out of it. It's what happens. Simple.

The simple things: like echoes of an afterthought, these little moments, little shifts, they grow into one another, and in growing they change each other, and as they change they become something new again - always having taken on and taken forward each other's characterstics, like a shadow of a memory, and adding and learning and contributing, binding with consistency the loose possibilities that will contribute to our evolution.

It's about moving, seeking out, involving, becoming. Not a journey along a line to a fixed point when it will all happen, when it will all be clear, but a journey within a circle that explores and maps the possibilities that arise along the way. We are here. We are not yet there, or there: this is what it is. Where are we going? From this moment to the next: from the centre to the perimeter and around, and back to where we came from, and then out again - finding, bringing back, showing, finding...

The process stays alive. it makes us human. Thinking, acting, thinking again, accepting or refusing. We know it already. We have always known it, but we needed to apply our thoughts to our methods. We are all people. The thought is the process. The act is the process. We are people, not definitions, or even things. This is us, and we are in this world, and we are in this world together.  - from Process; A Tomato Project

:

What is thought? Thought is travelling without motion.
What are words? Words are sound as form.  - from Process; A Tomato Project

:

Memory is a fluid that encases an event. We do not recall the event itself, only the shape that the fluid describes.  - from Process; A Tomato Project

 
---

Anyway, I'm worried. Photography, fun as it is, is very time consuming and annoying at times. Same for music although I find it a lot easier to get into. I'm worried about next year, but it'll pass. I'll forget/get over it.

There's plenty enough for everybody to worry about. I'm not going to make up some bullshit statistic about the comparison between worries and what actually happens, but I'm convinced that most of the time the fears are unfounded.

Still, it's weird, this year. It's like a limbo, almost. I don't really want to leave Macleans but at the same time I yearn for change and new experiences. Some days I find it unbearably boring, other days I wish it'd never end. It's like this huge vortex filled with doubt of the future, doubt of the present and uncertainty of tomorrow that spins and just like a roulette wheel, you don't know what happens until that wheel stops spinning.

What's today? Sad? Happy? Relaxed? Probably all three, at different times and varying degrees.

Bleh.

Thanks Jenny by the way for lending me those CDs and letting me have a badge. You rock! If I ever get a lot of badges and CDs you'll be sure that you'll have the right to take them off me.

And Ellen, you be careful. One day, that Frog will pay for the list. It will pay.

Woke up really early this morning. But I still was late to Production Orchestra practice which was at 7.30... I don't plan on being late to tomorrow morning's band practice though. I'd better not be. I'm excited. I hope we win.

I want to win.

Since not the Rockquest at least the Talent Quest. >.>

But actually it's just fun no matter what.

Who am I kidding of course I want to win.

I think we're (by we I mean FFOF/ Fist Full of Fives, which people just can't seem to get right, with everything from First Full of Fives to A Fistful Of Fives popping up...) playing for some people on Saturday as well, I can't be too sure though. I'm pretty sure...but not TOO sure.

I've had a long day. Woke up to the sound of domestic issues (which hopefully have solved themselves now, it's not exactly a pleasant awakening, yelling...) and basically from 8:00 to 8:00 I've been out of the house.

But it's all good. Only 10 more hours of schoolwork left until the weekend.

"Work" was good today. I say "work" because I didn't get paid today but hopefully from next week on I will. At the Rec Centre in Howick, pretty much what I used to do in the holidays except on a smaller scale now, and after school. It's such perfect timing that my study periods are last on Wednesdays, I can't get over how incredibly coincidental that is.

Hurrah, I have a job now. I don't feel so redundant any more.

More on meningitis.

That baby which is bleeding from between the legs is really scaring me. Damn you shock imaging pamphlets. Same to you woman at School Assembly. We get the point that it's a killer you don't need to keep repeating "DIE DEAD DEAD DEATH DIE".

Also, my brother (William) I found out was already vaccinated (by my dad) before the vaccine was available here. I feel special now, tee hee.

I also got a job recommendation from Sonny (cheers) - Rec Centre, after school care, Wednesdays. It'll be good, it will be. Or I hope so. I like money, and I don't use my time on Wednesdays very well anyway so I might as well work.

Today was mildly interesting. Points to ponder:

Band practice at lunchtime (or about half of it to be exact, Alex of 44th Calibre fame and some other people he was practicing with for some NCEA Assessment took the first half)...I can "kind of" play the drum part to The Vines - "Get Free" but as for John singing it, that's a different question. We also kind of tried "Somewhere Over The Rainbow", the Me First and the Gimme Gimmes version (they are a very wicked band by the way, if anyone is stuck on what to get me for a birthday present, there's a great hint for you)

[Consequential tangent: Birthdays are just really an excuse to have a party and get presents. I don't seriously believe that I can wake up one day and suddenly learn and grow a year's worth of learning and growing. Of course, corporate giants love to cash in on birthdays. Especially Hallmark and all those other greeting card bastards. Same with Halloween. Same with Valentines.]

I also listened in to J.A.C.K.'s practice after school. They're getting along pretty well for being together in such a short time and the fact that half of the people don't actually play the/any instruments. If I had to pick a weak link it would be Kate though (sorry, I can't tell this to you in person I'd be the crappest person to break it to you), who's probably alright on guitar but isn't really in time with the rest of the band. But meh.

Listening in to J.A.C.K. made me late coming home and I found my mum making dinner (which was dumpling thingies which she was making, thanks mum) [Talking about food, I made my own lunch today again. I feel like such a grown up now. HAH! And Tomo it turns out I don't have as many of those pineapple cakes as I originally thought I did.]

Got meningitis today. Or rather, a form which my mum has to sign if she wants me to get the meningitis vaccine. Supposedly it's a really poo vaccine and makes you feel really rotten but that probably means a day off. Something that would be nice but not something I can probably afford, what with exams coming up (yet again) and my photography board due.

Rikky passed me these CDs he bought at The Warehouse. I'm busy ripping them like a nice little pirate. I have to pay him some amount though to share the cost, or something. I'll be listening to them later to pick out a song or something.

Also, just then (well actually about half an hour ago) Taryn from the Howick Recreation Centre called and offered me a working spot for Wednesday's After School care. I'm excited. I had originally wanted to do this before but Sonny had taken two slots. Now that he's dropped one though he recommended me (thanks bro) and hopefully I can do a good job in his place.

It's pretty convenient that he dropped the Wednesday one as well because that's the only day I can reasonably make it to the Centre in time as I have study last period which means I'll be walking from school to the centre at around 2pm. I'm sure the teachers will understand that earning some dosh for myself is more important than sitting around, unsupervised trying to "study".

...wow, I wrote a lot. o_O

Finished Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic. Jeremy Soule (of Neverwinter Nights, Morrowind and Dungeon Siege fame) did a fantastic job with scoring original music and rearranging John William's epic film score. I'm busy "stealing" the music from the install folder right now.

I hate production practices. I mean I know it's probably going to be almost worth it in the end, but I've basically lost my weekend to production. Today (and yesterday) were the two nicest days we've had in a long time, and I spent them inside in a dark auditorium trying to play music with minimal light, and that nosyface Shredder who can't keep to herself.

Who is this Shredder, you may ask? Long story.

Yes...so I mean it's understandable that the last thing I want is for my brother to sneer at me and ask why I'm watching the credits to a game I just finish (and spent a good 30 hours on...). I'd just wasted all that time at production so I wasn't very refreshed or anything.

Meh, it's all past. Water under the proverbial bridge. You know the one.

The entire universe is one very big, delicate balance. The government taxes - the people lose money, but earn services. The government loses debt, but earns contempt.

Today was a balanced day (although I personally felt it tipped nicely to the positive side)

=Positive=

The biggest would probably be the Talent Quest singing heats. J-Bo aka John Boden, the amazing singing machine, got through in all three categories but me, Rikky and Sonny made it through to the group singing finals (which I suppose was fair enough we did spend a lot of time practicing - the curry and Seinfeld was a very good bonus of that though....no soup for you!) It was very fun performing to a pretty large crowd, and it was nice to see that people started clapping of their own accord in time to the music (or at least I had no hand in it - pun intended)  and although Rikky forgot a few words and I wasn't perfect either, it was great. (THANKS FOR THE SIGN ELLEN I SAW IT AND I WAS LIKE YUS THANKS)

Also, in the morning before all of the Talent Questing, there was the Year 13 photo. I'm probably going to purchase a copy sheerly for the novelty that I can say "it rained while that photo was been taken". How many students can say that? Not many, if any.

And even more coincidentally, the other photo I had at 9.25 for the Musical Production was rained on as well. It didn't stop raining so the photo was taken in the rain. That's even more novel...but I suppose I'd relate better to the whole of Year 13 than the Musical Production.

Maybe.

Another thought just came up. I hate the whole duality of Year/Form...it's hard enough for me to remember that Year 9 is the equivalent of Form 3, let alone take into account that Australians are back one Form or something silly like that.

=Negative=

Home family issues, same as usual. I didn't "make" my lunch this morning although I did pour my own juice into a drink bottle which served as a practice microphone for the performance (in which I wasn't accustomed to using a microphone...but it's all over and done now......oh wait, we have to pick a song now. Damn.) It rained while I was walking home with Janko and the red tie I was wearing got quite wet.

Also, I forgot to bring my brother's guitar back home. Come to think about it I forgot to ask him whether Sonny could borrow it. But I suppose he really wouldn't care considering he wasn't very supportive of me entering the Talent Quest anyway (ie "uh, what are you singing, you're not a singer, you're going to lose"...I may be paraphrasing slightly though) There's also another negative that relates to the guitar but...only Sonny and Rikky know what I'm talking about.

---

I've finished reading Tiger in the Well by Philip Pullman. I found it a lot longer but just as rewarding as its predecessor, Shadow in the North (needless to say I was very pleased when I found that Shadow in the North was the second part of a series...) I've still got one or two books left in that batch I've got. Once I finish I've got books requested at the library however, so I'll be able to keep going. I wonder when I'll get sick of reading. Probably never.

I've been really sleepy lately, mainly because of the practices that last until 11.30 at Rikky's house for Talent Quest thing. It's all worth it now though and I might catch an early night's sleep tonight, although I did say I would yesterday and it didn't happen....and the day before....

Yes...anyway thanks Rikky and Sonny, especially Sonny for putting up with my crap. In fact, thank you to everyone who puts up with my crap. I know I deal a lot of crap, sometimes they call me El Crapo...but thanks for not being fazed. Thanks to all the random people who congratulated our procession to the finals.

No thanks to the rotten cunts who said we sucked without basing that on anything.

And lastly, thanks to Australia for Golden Circle's Golden Pash. Though the name may sound kind of dodgy, the sweet nectar that filled my drink bottle was very refreshing.

Thanks to Ming I am introduced to Urban Dictionary.

*be warned the following links are probably mildly to extremely offensive depending on your ideologies, background etc*

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=henry&r=f

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=rikky&r=f

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=owen&r=f

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=mayonnaise&r=f

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=kuraden&r=f

That be enough for now o_O

I'm kind of hungry but I'm holding out to later tonight when I'm over at Rikkys because I don't want to be uncourteous and not eat food he said his mum would make.

I can't wait to go to sleep now. I've been getting tireder (is that a word?)  and tireder ever since the start of school. It's like a downhill slope. It's like a negative gradient.

It's like...-_-

The worst thing about the first day of the term was that after thirty minutes, it felt like I had never left, never had a holiday, never had a break from the day in, day out - ring of the bell, sullen march to next class, and so forth.
It really sucks, five years in the system. If only they'd keep things fresh once in a while, like announcing sudden classroom changes or something. But no, they have to be all regular and stuff.
BAND PRACTICE TOMORROW I CAN'T WAIT EVEN THOUGH I CAN'T PLAY FOR PEANUTS AND OTHER ASSORTED FOODSTUFFS.
Talent Quest singing thingy I got told today that I was singing tomorrow. Which was kind of nice.
And then after school Rikky tells me he wants to do a duet.
And then I'm all like, okay.
But that leaves me stressed and stresseder.
His mum should be coming to pick me up now. For the second practice in like, two hours. -_-

So that's it. Today was the last day and it was all a bit anti-climatic really.
 
I've sort of figured out my university pathway. Although I'm not too keen on the conjoint, its the only way my mum will let me take it. I'm doing BMus/BSc, although I'm not sure what I'll be majoring in for the Science part of the degree.
 
Maybe I'll look it up later.
 
I've just realised how much I miss reading books. Books don't talk back to you, they don't require you to subtly read other people's expressions to figure out what they are truly saying. So I went to the library again this morning, swapped out the books for a fresh lot.
 
Yeah.
 
I guess I'll see most of you reader people in school, then.

According to my mum, The Wizard of Oz is pronounced "The Wuz of Ozee".
 
Don't even ask...o_O
 
Anyway, went to a NZSO concert in Auckland Town Hall just then. Heard some famous (supposedly) cellist guy play Dvorak's Cello Concerto. Extremely hard, extremely impressive. Yes, yes.
 
But at the end of the day it's a sad realisation that the day after tomorrow (don't watch the movie) it's back to school again, where I have to work. I still have no idea how I'm gonna get the masters degree that I want.
 
And also looking back at that list I made a couple of days ago, it's nice to see that I accomplished nothing on that list.
 
Figures.

Reminder to self: http://www.brendakelly.com/wall-paper/1024x768/cello.jpg

(Interesting wallpaper, when it works...)

I went to the library and got my library card back yesterday. Honed in the fact that I hadn't gone to the library for ages (since the last time I went was when I still had my card sometime at the start of this year)...but at least I have my card back now. I borrowed four books too. I've read three, in no particular order the books I got out were:

+ The Cello, by James Riordan
+ The Broken Bridge, by Philip Pullman
+ The Shadow In The North, by Philp Pullman
+ The Rag and Bone Shop, by Robert Cormier

I got The Cello out because it was just sitting there on the shelf and it said "the cello". And obviously, being a cellist I was immediately drawn to the book. I got the Philip Pullman ones out because I enjoyed his "His Dark Materials" trilogy...and I got the Robert Cormier one because I saw "Beyond the Chocolate War" on the shelf and decided to try another of Cormier's books.

Hmm, I suddenly had this flashback, one of me being a crappy junior (as opposed to a crappy senior) in the school library and Ms. Wordsworth (I must have been Third Form) trying to pick a book for me to read since I didn't know of any good ones I wanted to read.

Random. Anyway, yeah, I've read The Cello, The Broken Bridge and The Rag and Bone Shop, and all three were very good.


--==The Cello==-

I thought this book was written quite well. It has a lot of parallels to Billy Elliot which was kinda nice considering I just saw the movie. The back of the book says: "Tom gets a lot of grief on the estate where he lives. He's not the same as the others. He's a bit different. Because he plays the cello he's a magnet for the bullies." So instead of ballet/tap dancing, the talent is playing the cello. Instead of a mining strike, it's a riot against paedophiles...and so forth, except Billy isn't gay. Yeah, its the typical "struggle and truimph" fare but still I thought a worthy read.

[This is who I am - whatever they say...]

--==The Rag And Bone Shop==--

This one was quite good. I found it a bit hard to get into but towards the end it was really good...tension was built well with the writing etc.

I'm getting quite lazy with these. Let's just say that they were good books and they served their purpose well, that is to stop me from being bored to death.

Although I do think the books would probably make a good movie...this is the same with most books I read though.

Hmm.

I wish I could play the cello better now, damn you book.

Damn you holidays being too short. There aren't many days left. To be honest I haven't really done much, watched a few movies, wasted most of my time on some crappy video game...

Watched Billy Elliot. I hate watching movies sometimes because I'm way too impressionable...but that's another story for another time.

For now, I will create a list of things to do before the holidays are over:

+ Spend half a day at the beach.
+ Write out the cello part for Wizard of Oz
+ Learn to play Moonlight Sonata

I'll probably end up not doing any of them but at least I've taken the first step, so says Dr. John Edwards, identifying the problem or somesuch.

I had another photo, really. But I don't like it cause I look more poo than normal so that will stay buried somewhere within the recesses of my hard drive, amongst the millions of other unused bytes of data.

PICTURES HERE (sorry for the poo resolution Rayho took it with his styly spy camera)

That Weetbix Crunch stuff with Honey is really quite nice. PICTURES COMING

I ate my first ever chilli dog today. Very very nice.

It's okay! Don't worry! I managed to find the sneaky hole which the pen fell through into my pants and I retrieved it. Phew.

Today was the last day of work for me these holidays at the HRC - we went ten pin bowling which I'd never done...I got a really poo score of 82 but I got a strike once so I don't care :P

My mum's at the hospital sending off someone...and I haven't had dinner and I'm hungry.

Believe it or not, somehow or rather I've gotten a black pen stuck in the interior layer of my pants and I can't figure out how it got in there and how to get it out...I can't find the hole which it probably slipped in (and therefore the hole to retrieve it from)

So I'm sitting here, and this black pen is just happily sitting here too.

It annoys me. I don't like things that annoy me...

Went to Burger King for lunch today! Got driven there by some random restricted driver person volunteer person. BK makes awesome chicken burgers...but Subway and Wendys is still better. (Wendys never ceases to amaze me at the speed they whip out those burgers especially since they claim that they are made when I order them...)

Was served by a mint looking server person. Mmm Mint... Can't remember the name I did get a glance at the tag but oh well. It's nice when you get served by someone who smiles too, that always makes your day just that little bit better. Especially when you know that you're already running late and have made plenty of mistakes at work.

Okay I just came back from watching Spiderman 2.

I really really liked it. I wasn't really expecting much but it was waaay better than the last movie I watched (The Day After Tomorrow, please do not watch that for the sake of your children) - even though it did still suffer from the same problem of American Patriotism as said movie suffered from, what with all these American Flags that just kept popping up all over the place. But this is forgivable simply because I thought the movie was just so good and also it was based in America (whereas, unfortunately for the rest of the world, global warming/ice ages are NOT confined to America)

Anyway where was I. Yes. I thought this was a great one (SPOILERS) although I'm a bit worried about Spiderman 3 if it ever comes out because Green Goblin again would be really poo. Doctor Octopus though he was so awesome, I wish I had those awesome arms and terrorized the shit out of everything in sight...they'd be mean. Hmm, hmm hmmh mhmh...the depiction of fusion was semi-accurate, I'm not 100% on the details but I'd presume they're not using the right stuff (tritium instead of deutrinium) and I'm not sure about that magnetic field thing.

Spiderman running out of web was funny. Spiderman falling around (and Peter Parker falling around) was funny. That asian violinist busker was funny. The train Spiderman rape scene was funny, where everybody just couldn't keep their hands to themselves. Mary Jane looks nice as usual.

Yes...it was a good movie. I hope the next one is just as good.

Before I go to sleep I must mention the angry usher woman (yeah, yeha yeah YEAH) who was standing there as we watched the credits because I (or actually Thomas but I have to pay him back) paid a good $14.00 to watch the movie and I was gonna squeeze everything I could out of it. So there I was, and the movie was over and nobody was siting in front of me so I figured what the hell, I'd stretch my feet and I propped my legs onto the chair.

Along runs this angry Polynesian woman with the angriest face and an angry demeanour, waving and flashing her usher lightstick thing and hitting it against the chair yelling something that we couldn't quite understand, due to her bad accent and general angriness. We finally figured out that she wanted us to put our feet down but a "put your feet down please" would have done it a lot easier than a random black angry usher woman in a neon green vest thinking she's all high and mighty with that torch of hers. WELL IF IT WASNT FOR US CUSTOMERS LITTLE MISS USHERBITCH YOU WOULD BE LIVING IN A DUMPSTER SO YOU COULD AT LEAST ASK NICELY FOR ME TO PUT MY FEET DOWN. EVEN IF YOU WERE TO SAY IT INCONVENIENCED OTHER PEOPLE IN THE CINEMA, YOU WOULD HAVE TO DEAL WITH THE FACT THAT EVERYBODY ELSE HAD LEFT, AND IF YOU SAID THAT THE BACK OF THE SEATS GOT DIRTY THEN YOU FORGET THAT PEOPLE ARE PAID TO CLEAN, AND THE LAST TIME I SAW SOMEONE ELSE USE THE BACK OF A CHAIR IN A CINEMA WAS TO, SURPRISE SURPRISE, PROP THEIR FEET UP AND NOBODY ELSE TOUCHES THE BACK OF A CINEMA CHAIR FOR ANY OTHER REASON.

...

Sorry. Damn I want those four limbs.

Came back from work just then: Big Rich, the team co-ordinator for my age group has moved on to a different pasture, and the new leader (Tanya) is nice and all but it just feels slightly disorganised. It was still good though, and I'm earning money AND having fun at the same time which is great. There's this one volunteer which really confused the heck out of me though...I don't think she was very good but that may just be because she keeps giving me misleading information, acts really stand-offish and told me to say "bottom" instead of "bum" when I haven't ever been told to ever before. (I wasn't aware that bum was rude o_O)

Maybe it's just me. But meh.

I might volunteer next week too solely on the premise that there's movies and laserstrike.

My mum thinks my hair is long and that I wasted the $10 on the haircut.

o_O

Then again this is my mum. I watched her attempt to chat with my dad with MSN today, quite funny it was, yes. My mum also didn't believe me when I told her Lake Taupo was the largest lake in NZ...

I have work tomorrow which means for me that I have to wake up at 6.00 tomorrow morning to prepare for my 7.30 shift.

Yes...

Who wants Gmail? (1000mb web-based email.)

Let me know I've got an invite.

From left to right, the people in this photo are: Lili, Raymond, Me, Rikky, Chris.

You know what's poo?

Having to go to school on the weekends...in the holidays...for a production practice which lasts 5 1/2 hours. It's very poo...

The good side of it though is that I've now got a really cool rocked up version of Somewhere Over The Rainbow...maybe I'll get us (FFOF) to play it. I think John would like.

I remember now!

It was a physics lesson. I have a wavelength. I could get diffracted or something but I'd have to be travelling incredibly slowly so it'd never happen.

...wow that wasn't as interesting as I thought but no matter:

HOLIDAYS

Thought of the moment:

Petrol stations are the most unorganised crazy places ever. Watch all the cars go in all different directions and wander aimlessly to get in and out of the place.

I went to the Warehouse. Bought a DVD for someone's birthday. Hurray.

Yes. I swear I had a lot more to write before I sat down. Oh well.

Me at the ball. That's Steph, looking fine as usual. The freaky eyes belong to Thomas.

...I forgot the preball.

==pre-ball==

Tomo's family gave me and sonny a ride there. Me and sonny waited outside my house since 5.00 to be picked up at around 5.45 but it's all good. While we waited I sang really loudly, songs like "Mexican Wine" and "New York, New York" and "Come Fly With Me". Must have been weird for people driving past to see a person in an orange suit singing really loudly.

The preball itself was kinda nice. I only ate one item of food, some random won-ton thing. The photo shoot was silly though. 20+ parents. 15+ cameras. Me being hidden behind Andrew because I'm short and Asian and he's white and studly. Flashes in all directions disorientating you and not knowing which camera to look at and blinking at inopportune moments.

But all is forgiven. :)

The RIDE TO THE BALL I CANT BELIEVE I DIDNT MENTION IN THE PREVIOUS POST

EASILY WORTH THE $30 going in the limo...

Rode in a Daimler DS420 (I think)...such a styly classic limo. Our driver was really cool and British like and polite and stuff. There was a centre window! It went up and down and scared Tomo because his head was in the way! The seats were leather and really luxurious...and very soft and springy. Tomo yelling "JAHOOO" and other assorted things to passersby (peasants as our driver called them) was entertaining. It just felt so classy...getting there in the limo. It was great...it was so great.

Huge thanks to Tomo for organizing that. And his mum too for fronting the money.

Oh man I am exhausted. I didn't get home after the after-after ball until 7.30 in the morning...and I slept until 5.00 in the evening. -_-

But it was a great time I thought. Much much better than last year anyway.

==The actual Ball itself==

So much better than last year! Even though the venue did seem a lot more crowded than last year (having a lot more people doesn't help) it was a great time. Things I remember:

+ Fake monopoly money used in the table centrepieces. (yes, fake monopoly money. Join me in saying "BWAHAHAH")
+ There were tables! More than two! People had room to sit down! The tables were nice, with a red felt throw over them.
+ Walking into the ball venue, red carpet! That cool music that they play at the Oscars when people arrive!
+ The cool bar place for drinks!
+ The music wasn't very good this year though...mostly techno/electronic drivel mixed with a few more pieces of shit like Britney Spears and Geri Halliwell.
+ But everyone loved my orange suit!
+ Seeing my photography teacher was kinda scary.
+ The food was great! Carved ham....cheesecake (which I ate upside down for no apparent reason), brandy snaps (which I don't really like anyway), banana cake with chocolate icing, lamingtons...mmm...and then there were the chips, samosas, chicken satays, sushi...a lot better than last year.
+ Sitting around in a table destroying the table piece and throwing cards around and the dice they hotglued to kebab sticks.
+ Watching Sonny go crazy.
+ Watching Brad go crazy.
+ BAND PHOTO!

Was it worth $80? Verdict: Yes, I suppose. Even though I didn't really do much for the night because I'm a loser and such, yes.

==The afterball!==

Didn't like the bus. Standing in buses when you're sleepy is poo. Especially when you're standing next to people who smell chronically like weed...or people who keep hassling your friends camera while singing Ben Lummis (you know who you are, you cunt) According to reports from my friends the set was exactly the same as last year, except in a different location (I'm not exactly sure but one of the parents said Onehunga and Tomo's cell said "Dresssmart") The alcoholic punch stuff was kinda diluted...which was strange. I don't think I had much at all, really. Five of those cranberry thingies. Only the slightest hint of alcohol. Still, was fun.

The portaloos at the place are funny. Those waterless hand sanitisers are really creepy...urghghg. And people who kick portaloos when people are still in there are just damn rude (not that I did it or had it done to me but I witnessed it happen enough to get a little annoyed) The lights were funky, and epileptic fit inducing.

And the burgers were nice! I hadn't had actual food in a while so I had to have two burgers. I could have gone for a lot more but I was too lazy to try and push through the huge conglomeration of people getting burgers.

I didn't really dance, no...I did for a bit but not enough to be justified or anything. I did sing a lot though. Well, relatively a lot. Anything is infinitely more than zero I suppose.

Yeah...and then I remember this story from Dion (the guy Kirsten took) about how his friend was killed by a machete over weed which is why he doesn't smoke it anymore. Yeah.

What else...oh the sand was nice. Though very bizzare, it was nice. It was probably covered in puke though.

And that was pretty much the afterball...like the ball itself except more partylike and less food and me getting progressively more tired.

The bus back to the Highland Park carpark was just as bad as getting to the afterball...

But Raymond's dad driving out a no-exit path was pretty kewl.

==after-afterball==

Here is where I am confused. I'm not sure whether this was great or not. It was nice being very tired in a room full of 50 odd people...I suppose. I remember playing with Ellens "MY FIRST PIANO" book (THANKS ELLEN)...yeah...and also Ryan sleeping in the doorway you silly Ryan you. And...I remember undoing my tie and helping Steven undo his (I actually tied my own tie this year, which was quite nice I suppose although it was a bit munted - no where near as gimpy looking as Willie's tie though, no offence) I remember John pulling the fingers at me because I woke him up. And then he kept scaring me with eyebrows.

I slept for four minutes at Ellen's after-afterball. Nodded off at 6.56, woke up at 7.00 when Ellen turned the light on and woke everyone up..tee hee

Ellen's mum nicely cooked everyone breakfast, I wish my parents were that cool. She liked me and Raymond's suits too which makes her EXTRA cool. Tee hee. I didn't have any food which I'm kind of regretting right now because it looked good and I was kinda hungry and I'm still kind of hungry now and I don't think I'll be seeing food that great until my mum gets back.

Yes. Then Raymond's mum gave me a lift home...and on the way back I saw the most incredible sunrise I'd seen in a very long time (I don't wake up early enough to see it usually) - it was a golden wash of brilliance. A great end to a great night.

And then I fell asleep when I got home and woke up at 5.00 in the afternoon. Come on give me a break I was up for almost 22 hours.

Now I'm hungry.

Damn I wish I had decent food right now...

If you want a really bizarre experience let me recommend getting your hair cut in a hair salon which caters for customers who speak a different language to you. For example, English speaking in a Korean hair salon.

Okay okay I admit yes I went and got my hair cut at a Korean hair salon just then, and Sonny and his mum nicely dropped me off there and Sonny stayed to translate. It was just so bizarre, three people talking away in Korean and you standing there just going "uh...". Yeah..

But anyways I'm really happy with my new hair, although I'm still having to get used to my head being about half the weight it normally is. The hair is, kinda long, yet not really. It's a lot thinner. And comfy, yes. All for $10 which is cheaper than wherever Thomas was gonna take me so nyah nyah take that.

The ball is almost here. I'm kinda pseudo excited, it's just fun dressing up formally and seeing all your mates in dresses and suits. The list of things I've done in preparation so far are:

+ Get a ball ticket (duh)
+ Get an afterball ticket (duh)
+ Get invited to an after-afterball (hmm...)
+ Get transportation to the pre-ball.
+ Get transportation from the pre-ball to the ball.
+ Get transportation from the ball to the afterball.
+ Get transportation from the afterball to the after-afterball.
(here is where the transportation train stops - I don't know how I'm getting home from the after-afterball but I'm sure I'll figure that one out..)
+ Take a shower this morning (hurrah)
+ Shave (wasn't much but just to look extra extra clean shaven)
+ Get my hair cut
+ Get my suit altered

And the list could go on but I'm bored and more pressing matters are at hand.

To those going to the ball I'll see you there!

I'm sitting here typing this blog feeling really poor and ghetto like.

For dinner I'm having cereal...more specifically a blend of tasteless Kellogg's Wheat Biscuits, which is basically their throwback to Weetbix (har har) mixed with some Corn Flakes (the one and only) which expired August 2003.

Tastes bland.

I'm not having a good day today, I just feel really agitated and annoyed. Officially I can't milk any more money out of our home pantry, it's all run out. I managed to scrounge up enough money for one more week of tuition ($50) and $15 for a haircut tomorrow but after that, our financial status is a big nice ZERO.

The haircut better not cost more than fifteen dollars...

I mean, technically we haven't run out of money - I've still got my own eftpos card and all. It's just I really really don't like touching that money because it's so hard for me to earn money that each time a dollar leaves the account a little baby dies somewhere. A cold and gruesome death, may I add.

Oh yes. Haircut. I've decided I could at least look decent for the ball, not that it really matters or anything but if the ladies are gonna spend hours (literally) doing their hair in all sorts of manners I could at least go and get mine cut properly. People playing with the back of my head kinda got really annoying today as well.

Hmm, hmm hmm....

My internet right now is pooey. Sites can take anywhere from INSTANTANEOUSLY FAST to ridiculously s l o w to load, and it's really annoying me. My computer in the pre-virus era at least was kinda predictable...

Tomorrow 7th Formers doing NCEA (most of them) get the day off. It's going to be a very crappy day tomorrow....

116.

Me and Mr. T just went on a giant quest to obtain the ever elusive "AFTERBALL TICKETS"...yes. They cost so damn much though but I don't have a choice since there's really no other way that I can get back home from the ball.

The tickets are really funky (although they must have cost so much to make...) - they're blue...they're plastic and have a magnetic strip. Talk about technology.

The afterball had better be good.

Apparently some people don't like my hair now (ie Thomas' mum :P ) but some people like it.

But I don't see my own head often, and even less so the back of my head so I don't really care too much. I might get it done properly or something though before the ball...but I'm probably just saying that.

Okay. Woke up today. Kinda felt really poo and tired because of yesterday's grueling boredom of sitting down in the same seat for hours listening to (mostly) the same old drivel brand of music...but meh, what can you do.

After I came back from tuition, I was going to go and get my hair professionally cut.

But then I realised that I didn't give a shit (and also we didn't actually know where this place to get your hair cut was anyway)

So I got home, got my brother to just snip off hair at the back of my head so it doesn't touch my collar (I had promised Mr. Campbell that I'd have my hair cut by Monday which coincidentally is tomorrow)

It's a great feeling because:

1) I won't be getting in trouble with the school yay (the cunts gave me a 4 for appearance..out of 1 - 6 where 1 is the highest)
2) I saved ten dollars, yay!

Indeed. I was originally planning to lobby this year and try and get the rule changed and all but then I realised I really didn't care. If the school wants my hair cut, whatever. It's just hair. I mean, it probably looks like shit now after my brother haphazardly cut it but I can't see the back of my head anyway so it matters very little to me.

Although I still disprove of the rule, I really cannot be bothered going through all the effort to deliberately break it and all.

This morning, woke up, got ready, took a shower, had muesli (Hubbards Cereal is the best...)... got in the FIST FULL OF FIVES VAN (tm) and I recieved my official "BAND MEMBER T-SHIRT", complete with logo and my nickname on the back. Apparently, I'm cursed, because my shirt screwed up so they re-did it. Or so says John.

Back from the Rockquest. We didn't make it through...which I didn't mind. It was a great experience, with all the gear and the rest of the guys were awesome (except that I couldn't really hear them because my kit was shitty and the foldback speaker next to me wasnt working) It's just that some of the "bands" that got through I don't think deserved it as much as some other people there. Like, there was this one band with some crappy high-nuts 10 year old kid...who I assume only got through because their guitarist was decent and the singer was like...10...but everything else, the drumming, the vocals, were shite. Sitting down from 11.30 to 6.00 just to find out that you've wasted six and a half hours of your life is kinda stink though.

At least 44th Calibre got through.

Hmm. Yes. We then went to "drown our sorrows" at a party. Actually I didn't drink much at all, just had one Flame so it didn't really do anything. I did have fun acting like a shit though, what with all the random singing and yelling comments at the stupid TV (ah, that stupid cunt on Who wants to be a Millionarie, or more like Who wants to waste all three of their lifeline thingies on a fucking Fifth Form Chemistry question)

I'll be here wondering how we got beaten by a band from an intermediate school and four black people. -_-

I HATE COMPUTER VIRUSES SO MUCH I HATE THEM I HATE THEM

I hope the rotten bastard who sits in front of a computer with malicious intent gets his fingers ripped into little tiny pieces and fed to Ethiopians (killin two birds with one stone...or finger)

I also thought my brother's laptop died but it was a false alarm, I noticed that there was a floppy disk inserted, took it out and then it worked. Dang boot disks.

My computer at home is now dead. I got struck with the Sasser Worm (which is a fucking virus made by some dirty cunt in Germany I'm sorry I'm just really angry)...so I'm making this post at school during my study period.

So basically, the worm deleted my Windows. So now I can't run it without the Boot CD. In a panic when I got windows back up and running temporarily I backed up all my music and files and so on.

Hmmmmmm it sucks.

If you use Windows 2000/XP make sure you get your computer patched:

http://www.microsoft
.com/security/incident/sasser.mspx

Yes...

Fix it before the worm deletes your windows -_-

There was a meeeaaaan sunset on the way home from school...the sky was literally orange and magenta for about ten minutes of blazing glory.

Yes.

I had a very intriguing and thought provoking blog post in my head somewhere but that has disappeared...other than I've started workin on a website for Fist Full of Fives, nothing's really changed.

My thoughts on: "six degrees of separation".

I know that's a phrase. I know it's well known. I just...don't know enough to make a good statement on it. Sorry Rikky.

I'm sorry, I'm listening to Blink 182 again. "lalalal did you hear he fucked her"

Went to the Rockshop today with Tomo. He bought a new guitar strap with flames (yus) and strap locks so that his strap doesn't keep falling off...and I was gonna buy brushes but they cost waaay too much. ($45ish)

But at least we have that discount card thing. I'm sitting here and thinking about Saturday and I'm already nervous. It's crazy.

I haven't had a "philosophical thought-provoking" blog post in a while. I thought I'd give you, dear reader, a refreshing change to my boring pointless drivel on things happening in my mundane life.

I'm now accessing my innermost thoughts.

I was browsing through my links...and realised just how many darn blogs you can link to. It's crazy, it's like a spreading virus. What manner of beast have I unleashed? (Or rather, what manner of beast has my brother unleashed? And so on.) It's like the internet, everything's connected.

That brings me to my belief of "interconnectedness". Like, how everything is related. Let's take the example already cited.

cause ---> my brother creates blog ---> I create blog ---> Rikky creates blog ---> a fucking shitload explosion of people create blogs

Would any of this possibly have happened if my brother had not create a blog? Probably not - but then by the realms and rules of possibility who knows what the true answer to that question is (other than nobody knows?)

It's a lot like life. Kinda like that stupid French guy in the matrix who says "causality blah blah other French shit etc... cause and effect". Life is one big cause and effect. Your mum and dad had a fun night, effect = you. Like the internet! Click on a link, go to somewhere. Which has a link. To somewhere. Just how damn far does the rabbithole go? Maybe the rabbithole never ends, you just end before the rabbithole does.

Hmm.

Life is like the internet, a giant mass of events that occur sequentially.

Hmm.

Yes.

Someone ask me an intriguing question in the tag-board, I'll answer it to the best of my ability.

Came back from a very nice lunch with Sonny (black bean noodles, delicious).

Performed in the DeCroy Chamber Music Competition this morning which was at Dilworth College...it was a lot of fun, strangely...even though I almost walked onto the stage before the people were ready -_-

But it was fun.

All boys schools are strange indeed, and for rich people....damn you rich people! (I'm just jealous) But imagine spending your entire school day never seeing a mint lass. That would be a sad sad time indeed.

Of course it also means you can prance around naked if you're into that kind of thing.

While in Physics tuition I had the Blink 182 song Dammit stuck in my head. Couldn't realy concentrate but I managed to work out why I wasn't getting Kirchoff's Loop Law to work properly for me and my school work on capacitance saved my bum.

I think I'm addicted to drumming. I think I'm addicted to the band.

Screw video games, music's where the fun is really at.

I want a kit. I want to practice. I want to be as good as the drummer for 44th Caliber and Gladdis. I want our band to win the Coke Smokefree Rockquest. I want it. So incredibly badly.

The first step is the heats. I'm kinda worried. Even just thinking about it now makes me kinda nervous...but I really really really wanna go through the heats. I really do. I think I'll have to work on creating more interesting and kick-ass drumming patterns if I wanna enhance our original, cause Dave does brilliant bass work, Thomas thrashes out these mean guitar solos, John's got the mean vocal melody...but I pretty much play boring staple drumming (which is at the moment all I can do)

I wonder if I can pull out something fantastic by Tuesday.

I need to practice to be good. I wonder why I didn't work this one out before ;_;

This morning, even though I didn't get to sleep until about 12:00 (although I physically went to bed at 10.15) I managed to haul my butt out of bed at 6:00 in the morning, feeling incredibly, incredibly tired and took a shower and chowed down breakfast and ran off to school for a band practice at 7.00 in the morning...;_;

To try and boost our spirits/energy, John (the singer) brough along these carboshot things, which is basically this extremely extremely high-inducing gel substance that tastes slightly better than glue...after eating about half a tube I felt like throwing up because it was just so...blerghg. But it did give me a crazy kick.

The rest of the day was pretty boring as usual, but after school there was the school "Rockfest", in which our band (Fist Full of Fives) was opening for...it was really really great, except that:

1. The smoke machine was a bit overused...I couldn't see the rest of the band at times.
2. I dropped my sticks while playing in a song....o_O I really hope that doesn't happen. Ever. Again.

But it was fun, even though again I have this crazy feeling that I've let the entire band down. Hmmmmm...

Yeah, the other two bands that were playing (44th Caliber, Gladdis) had wicked awesome drummers and I would give a lot of money to have even a little bit of the talent and drumming wickedness they had. I just feel like I'm letting my entire band down for some strange alien reason...maybe I am, maybe I'm not - who knows?

But Gladdis had a hard time since they were last (most of the crowd actually left after we stopped because those were the people who just hung around after school to see it for a bit and go home) and it was their first time playing publicly (I think) - and it really didn't help that they had technical difficulties. They dealt with it really well though, not panicking or anything.

We had a great crowd response. We got crowdsurfing (YEAH) and the most moshing (YEAH)...44th Calibre played a decent (but very dragged out and tedious set) I thought, but their drummer makes up for it all. \o/ It's so not fair, I swear there's a group of drummers hiding somewhere going "tee hee look how crap the drummer for Fist Full of Fives is compared to the other two bands te hee"

;_;

I hope this feeling passes. Maybe it's just because I dropped my sticks. I hope John can get the performance in house assembly organized so I can try and redeem myself from that horrible, horrible mistake.

Tomorrow I have to wake up early again -_- because of the DeCroy competition. But I'm not really worried/looking forward/caring about that...it's more the rockquest I'm psyched for. I REALLY REALLY WANT TO WIN IT IR REALLY RELAYRLEYALRY DO.

If I get through the heats I swear I will actually start taking lessons and find some time to practice. I just don't think it's fair for John, Tomo and Dave to be stuck with me at the current standard I am. ;_;

Yeah. That was depressing I'm sorry. Or maybe you're laughing at me, that's all good. Meh.

Wahoo, we got the original nailed now I think. It's a lot better I think because:

1. It's tighter and sounds more like an actual song (since originally the verse and chorus was pretty much exactly the same thing)
2. New and improved vocal melody/lyrics - I kinda gave John a few ideas but he deserves all the credit.

Yes.

Tomorrow morning I have to be up at like 6.00 because we want a practice at 7.00 since....we're playing tomorrow after school.

Hmm.

Yes.

Hmm came back from a "band meeting". Kinda fixed up the original to make it more "fresh and new and youth of NZ music" (which is coincidentally what we wrote on our entry form to the Rockquest.

It appears that our band is most likely entered down under the Auckland heats. Yes.

I want a drum kit. I miss my red nice one in Malaysia...I really want to get it shipped out to New Zealand...but hey...hmm.

Yes. The sunsets are now a lot earlier in the morning and in the evening now...it's strange, we've had such brilliant ones recently...and the air's been a bit cold.

After the Chem exam earlier this morning I went to see "The Day After Tomorrow" which is extremely good and bad at the same time. (SPOILER WARNING, I WILL RUIN THE MOVIE FOR YOU IF YOU READ ON.) Good first:

+ Nice touchy feely family movie designed for an American audience

+ Fantastic touch of irony where the people are saved by books. Har har har.

The rest was pretty bad. It's just that it seemed so damn unreasonable...maybe it is feasible but if it was I doubt you'd be able to run away from freezing cold like the people in the movie did. Okay, I'll list all my complaints.

+ The damn painfully obvious American Patriotism. Look at the Statue of Liberty, and see how it stands after being hit by a fucking massive tidal wave! Look at the American flag waving so valiantly in the wind! It's so fantastic! (puke puke)

+ The entire movie is all that one guy's fault. The guy running the drill...I swear he actually did do something very stupid...and cause that huge chunk of ice cap to break off and melt, and disrupt the balance between fresh and salt water in the oceans and cause all this shit to happen all over the world!

+ That silly girl in the "main romantic interest" of the story. She was incredibly, INCREDIBLY stupid. If you cut your leg open trying to save a French lady, fair enough, but at least have the sense to get it looked into. I mean, how could she not have noticed how damn shitty it looked or felt? To ignore a cut for three days that severe was pretty stupid...if she had gotten it cleaned up she wouldn't have forced those three people to go into a ship and find some medicine for her - and as a result hurt some OTHER guy's leg.

+ You can't run away from "APPROACHING SUB ZERO TEMPERATURES!!!" (well, common sense dictates otherwise)...watching the people run away from the cold was just really funny for me to watch.

+ To be saved by some piddly fire created by burning books was kinda stupid...but not as bad as being saved by a shitty as gas burner in some Wendy's. The fire was so small and crap, it wouldn't have done anything other than waste fuel. Wouldn't the gas have frozen at that ridiculous temperature anyway? Hmm.

+ Fucking retard astronauts. What the hell do they not have, windows? (oh wait, they do) They actually need to be ASKED whether the sky's cleared up...you'd think sometime one of them would just happen to glance out the window and go "Hey look it looks clearer, let's do our job and tell the people down there it looks like it's clearing up" instead of floating around like dipshits and playing with each other or whatever they do to pass time in space...until they get asked to do something.

---

Sorry if I sound angry. I believe it was almost worth my $9 that I paid for it...almost. It was fun to laugh at and I suppose it was very touching in a very "I'm not American but if I was narrow minded like most of them were" way.

Finished the last Chemistry exam.

It was kinda fun in a "spiritual release" kind of way. I used up the rest of the ink in my nice black inky pen but that's okay...

There is absolutely no chance at all that I will pass this time, what with my fantastic answers to the questions.

Example: Inert organic compounds that involve elements from the halogen group are important. Name three compounds and their uses.

Answer: HCl. It is used in swimming pools, because of its inertness. If it was not inert it would eat little children.

Example: State the reagents and conditions which are required in the hydrolosis of an ester.

Answer: Agent Smith: "Have you ever had that feeling, where you're not sure if you're awake, or still dreaming?"
Yes, my chances bode well for me...-_-

I had a lot of fun though. I drew many many things, such as Shrek the Sheep, a box, James Bond, moles (in reference to a question which asked how many moles there were of a substance...hahah get it moles hahah) and leaf alcohol.

Eating Media Lunch is the best TV program..ever.

What with (what I hope) is the fake screening of the death of Shrek the sheep, Jeremy Wells nicely saying "Cuntstable" (on national TV HAHAHA) and footage of the dumbarse Paul Holmes going "DONT WAVE CHILDREN NO DONT WAVE THE VIEWERS AT HOME DON'T LIKE IT" (which I think is a load of horseshit, if kids want to wave let them, don't get all uptight just cause it may set off your prostate Mr Holmes)...Eating Media Lunch = best TV show ever.

My thoughts on:

Cheese.

Some cheeses have holes. Now I think that was a devious marketing ploy by the Swiss to make having less cheese more desirable. Holes don't taste like anything. Are they even required in the cheesemaking process? Perhaps I'm wrong but...I don't know. The taste of holes is not good for me. Some may argue on the same premise of donuts but to be honest donuts are just overhyped fried pieces of dough anyway. Speaking of devious marketing ploys, what's with associating cute cartoony mice with cheese? I think they want little kids to go "hey that's cool the mice which are the protagonists who escape from the evil things like bad cats and fangs and consumption of self eat cheese - MUMMY I WANT CHEESE" and watch the little kids proceed to bawl their eyes out in some stuffy Supermarket Aisle. Kids like that are stupid, spoilt and should be kicked very hard in the butt for being stupid, on the account that:

1. Mice are not real.
2. Mice like all food, not just cheese.
3. Your mum pays for your food. Stop complaining.

Hmm. I think I'm getting quite angry. I don't mean to be, I think it's just my sickness and headache showing through.

Today, I went to school only for the first early bit because:

1. I wanted to hand out all the CDs I made for the band (which I did)
2. I had to hand in my Ball entry form and pay for the tickets.
3. I had a performance in House Assembly.
4. I had to pay Pei Yun to get on the PARTAY BUS which will take me to the ball.
5. I didn't really want to miss anything in class even though I'm on study leave.

I woke up feeling moderately crap, but by the time Maths was over I was very, very sick so I had to go home, getting Jason to write down nice notes for me in Physics...yes...I then went home and slept from 11.00 to 2.45 - which figures. I feel a little bit better though, even though I have an exam tomorrow and I am completely screwed over for it.

I'm still very happy about Sunday night. I can't wait to watch the video which I hope is good.

And if anyone has any ideas on where to rent a very cool flash car, let me know - I may not go to the ball in the party bus but I might get my brother to chaffeur me there. Maybe.

Maybe.

Random interesting things I remember from last night:

- The people literally brought the house down while we were playing. Like, for a while near the end of our set there were people trying to put back the support beam in Kim's garage.

- The moment when the crowd chanted "Fist Full of Fives". It was at that moment I was like, "hey, I could get used to this."

- Tim. 100% respect to you. 99% because you kick major booty on the drums, 1% because I believe you were wearing the same pair of underwear as I was. o_O

- Ellen as the dirty maid, singing really loudly along with "All The Small Things". Classic.

---

Anyway the recordings have been transferred onto my computer in which it will springboard into the rest of the world. Unfortunately while transferring from Sonny's MD to my computer the sound went from Stereo to Mono, and since there really wasn't another way I could think of to get the music off the MD for now Sonny still has the ultimate recording of it. He'd better not lose it.

I also made six CDs just then, a personalized copy for each band member and Sonny, and a distribution copy in case people actually want to listen to it. I think I'll let John handle that.

If anyone can think of an awesome place to put the recordings (on the internet) please let me know. I'm workin on that.

My stupid internet is also randomly disconnecting on me, which doesn't make my uploading job any easier.

Okay, I just came back from a party. I am soooo psyched. It just hit me now (not while I was there...like sudden onset AIDS.)

Well basically our band did our first ever live performance, complete with a darkish room, video recording, sound recording, people (lots of them, about 100) and music! AND IT ROCKED IT WAS SO INCREDIBLE. Just to watch a crowd jump up and down to music you play, man, that's an awesome feeling. I can't wait to see the video and get the recording (which is pretty high quality) on my hands!

I'm excited for the Rockquest, I really am.

There was this drummer though, Jen's boyfriend and he was really good. I kinda felt a bit stink for a bit cause he was so much better than me :P But he was really really great. It was nice getting his approval too.

It was great. Really, really great.

AH IT WAS SO GReATTETEAEATEAEAT

When I get the recordings back I'll link to them.

I had a strange dream where I had a hair cut.

I can't decide if it was scary or not.

Thomas tell your mum she is kool. With a "k".

Hmm. I wrote something for the College Herald. I want $250. I WANT IT WE WANTS IT


---


Yesterday, I heard from one of my friends that a student somewhere in New Zealand was suspended from the school he attended. Why? Because he fashioned his hair after our New Zealand Idol and his famous shaved haircut.

Of course, he only said this to me because of my own hair, which passes the top of my shirt collar – an offence of my school’s uniform rules or so teachers tell me every day. As much as I love being a rebel, disobeying the school is not something I or most students enjoy doing. So “what gives”, you ask?

Common sense tells us that school rules are created to protect students and encourage a positive environment for learning and education. Keeping that in mind, how does having hair past the collar on your shirt stop you from solving a mathematical equation or writing an essay? The weight of my hair is not enough to force my head backwards or slow me down, and does not house head lice (or at least I hope not).

Although it may not seem like it, I think that most of my school’s rules are reasonable. No smoking and alcohol? I support that – usage is illegal for most of the student population anyway. No makeup? I would not be using makeup anyway, as much fun as it would be to attend school with lipstick and eyeliner. It is when a school forbids its male students to have their hair past their collar that I object.

All I really want is to have my hair long – today’s society is all about freedom of choice and having rights, after all. Most normal people would give in to the pressure and spend ten dollars or more to get their hair cut. But I am not a normal person so I stand up for my rights.

The next step for me if I was to try to keep my current hairstyle meant finding out what would happen if I refused to get my hair cut and ignored the teachers. Apart from the typical school fare of detentions and essays, a quick internet search showed me that according to the YouthLaw website (www.youthlaw.co.nz), a student can be stood down or suspended on the grounds of continual disobedience where he or she is “deliberately and regularly failing to do what [they] are told”.

My heart sinks. I do not want to be stood down, and as strange as it may sound I really do enjoy school and the people I meet there. But I read on. “As well as being...’continual disobedience’, [the] behaviour must set a harmful or dangerous example to other students. The behaviour must be likely to cause serious harm, not just to be harmful.”

Having my hair past my collar has definitely not been harmful and has not set a dangerous example to other students. Nobody seems to have suddenly started growing their hair just because I have. Although it would have been very flattering, I am glad nobody has since it is part of what defines me and my individuality. In the same way, a Ben Lummis hairstyle does no harm to anyone, but as it got a student suspended it must be harmful in a way. Maybe the school I heard about got it all wrong. Perhaps the suspension was unjustified.

To take away the right of education of a student because their hair looks different to everyone else’s seems unfair. Suspension on the basis of looks sounds a lot like discrimination. YouthLaw states that “students have the legal right not only to attend school but to be educated.” What a student’s choice about their hairstyle has to do their right to schooling bewilders me.

School rules are like society – most of them work well for the good of us all, but a few of them are unhelpful and negative. A school rule should be for the good of all students, and all other reasons are secondary. I hope that in the future, schools will look past shallow appearances and focus on the important things. However, until they do, I will probably remain a rule-breaker.

---

Critique as much as you want, I want that $250.

Also I have to hand in my money for the ball...man I'm so poor it's not fair. Stupid fucking corporate world we live in.

I was gonna say something about Asian musicians doing crappy Asian covers of songs such as "Murder on the Dance Floor" and "All Right"...but then I realised I just did.

Tomorrow I will attempt to only turn right.