He didn't write this, either.

Yes, they were beautiful. They were also identical. This is what everyone would look like if Hitler had won the war, I thought. The Hitler Youth vibe was very strong: Short hair, smooth shaves, good tans, many blondes. Maybe there was more mincing than goose-stepping, but it’s all the same shit. Did we really defeat fascism just to recreate the damned thing at the outlet mall?

Actually, no. We probably defeated fascism because we didn’t like those hideous brown tunics that the Volksgrenadiers insisted on wearing. Anyone who dons an outfit like that deserves a swift bayonet to the kidneys.